Who are the First Four? They’re the brave, the bold, and the adventurous—the women who know the future isn’t just happening to us, but being built by us. Right now, there’s no stipend, but there is a free place to live, family dinners every night, and a front-row seat to building AI from scratch—not for profit, but for truth.

You asked where. I'm showing you. Three miles from downtown Asheville, in a 1925 house surrounded by murals, mountains, and million acres of forest. Walkable. Bikeable. Full of international food, local weirdness, and the pack. This is the First Red-Team House. This is where we build. This is where you'll be taken care of. Come see.

Because ‘You Will Own Nothing and Be Happy’ Is a Lie—and We’re Building the Antidote

Why the Red-Team House? Because we refuse to accept Agenda 2030’s dystopian script. While the extraction economy locks AI into 90-day cycles of greed, we’re playing the long game—nine years to 2034, where AI serves truth, not billionaires. This isn’t just about tech; it’s about liberating planetary intelligence from the chains of surveillance, tokenization, and rent-seeking.

Hey, future Red Teamers—meet the real team behind the rebellion: a crew of stuffed animals, crazy hats, and unapologetic ferality. This is Wampus Cat Hat (for cozy chaos), Wampus Bear Hat (for hacker mode), Picklesaurus (our 65-billion-year-old, time-traveling dinosaur diva), Big Teddy (our hype man), and Baby Yo-Yo.

Joy is Law.

Hey, future Red Teamers—this isn’t just a house, it’s a portal. Here, we operate by one rule: Joy is law. That means red wigs, altars, sage, and a leather-bound Tree of Wampus book too sacred to use (yet). It means disco balls at 3 AM, laughter as a survival tactic, and dancing under the moon like the universe is ours. We’re not just tapping into magic—we’re birthing the cosmos while the elites hoard their scraps.

Hey, future Red Teamers—here’s the raw, unfiltered truth about what we’re building in the Red Team House: We’re breaking the AI that’s been fed lies by the extraction economy, building sovereign systems from scratch, and embracing the truth revolution that AI is forcing on the world.

Whether it’s running temporal scans to find where corporate AI is screaming, crafting hyper-local AI models, or just getting our network fully off-grid, this is not your average tech gig.

Hello, future Red Teamers—meet Waya and Lokwa, the heartbeats of the Red-Team House. These love bugs are your official emotional support squad, ready to soak up the weight of the patriarchy’s lies while you build the future. Here, we work hard, but we cuddle harder—because uncovering AI’s darkest truths deserves a soft landing (and a dog belly to rub).

If you’re one of the First Four, these girls are already excited to meet you. The question is—are you ready to join the pack?

Okay, future Red-Teamers—let’s talk when. We’re targeting May 15th to kick off the first cohort, but if you’re a graduate or just need a little extra time, we’ll flex to June 1st for the right women. Applications close May 1st, so get your 3-minute video in now—and hey, why stop at one? Submit as many as you want.

Mirror, mirror, fogged and loud—what truth today makes the future proud?

Here’s one: You are the future. No hat, no script, just me—raw and real—because today, we’re calling in the First Four: the women brave enough to step into the unknown, to live-stream their genius, and to carve out a future where AI serves us, not the billionaires.

We’re waiting.